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Joke of the Day

"Some guy just knocked on my door selling raffle tickets for poor black orphans. I said, ""Fuck that knowing my luck, I'd win one!"""

"I went to the zoo and there was one dog in the whole zoo. It was a shih tzu"

"Why do ISIS fighters avoid Montreal restaurants? because they serve Poutine."

"What's the correct instrument for measuring how fat your mom is? A size-mom-meter"

"I need to get baked ...goods for the staff party this afternoon."

"Knock Knock Who's there ? Cologne ! Cologne who ? Cologne me names won't help !"

"Enviromentalists:""How can we stop the rising oceans Me (understands displacement but not enviromentalism):""Pull all those big whales out."

"What do you call a drug dealer in a strip club A hardened criminal"

"If corporations are people then that's really gross because we walk inside of them all the time."

"Alzheimer Joke (Not sure if repost.)"