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Joke of the Day

"Girlfriend asking her Boyfriend about her looks Girlfriend: ""Am I pretty or ugly?"" Boyfriend: ""You're both."" Girlfriend: ""What do you mean?"" Boyfriend: ""You're pretty ugly."""

"[murder occurs] ME: how terrible. why can't we love each other [someone slightly inconveniences me] ME: I will execute your entire family"

"imagine a reverse pizza. the missing hole on the table where the pizza is meant to be. everything else is pizza. the solar system. the air."

"Don't bite the hand that feeds you. There's barely any meat on it. Go for the thighs."

"The legal system is like bleach, Works perfectly for whites, but not with colors."

"Tasteless Irish joke: How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None. Happy saint Patricks Day!"

"We're all big racist time bombs set for ""elderly."""

"This is embarrassing. I tunneled through my wall to escape work and ended up in my boss's office. He's watching me tweet this. I'm fired."

"What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? Run! She has a grenade in her mouth!"

"A man posts a Joke on reddit It is not a repost."