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Joke of the Day

"""Changed the name on my iPhone to titanic. Now when I connect to iTunes it says the...... Titanic is synching"""

"My girlfriend said she's fed up of me pretending im a detective, and we should split up... I told her that's a great idea, we can cover more ground that way."

"Historical fact: The term ""bro"" originated over a hundred million years ago and was short for brontosaurus."

"Why did the chickens cross the road? Because they were Turkish."

"*Takes ex girlfriend's poem on Antiques Road Show* Sir these are worthless *Winks at camera* Told you Karen!"

"A blonde in labor walked into a pizza shop because the the delivery was free."

"I was in NYC and a black guy asked me if the Yankees won. I replied, ""Yeah, man, you're free."""

"How do you get a dog to stop humping your leg? Pick it up and suck its dick..."

"How do you get a fat girl into bed? It's a piece of cake"

"you stole my electron atom 1: you stole my electron. atom 2: sure? atom 1: positive!"