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Joke of the Day

"Hey, do you like Duck Hunt? What are you, a lesbian duck?"

"If Hillary Clinton wins the election I am moving to Benghazi. At lest I know she will leave me alone there."

"I asked my secret crush if she wanted to invest in my new invention idea, chloroform kleenex. She decided to sleep on it...at my place."

"How awkward would it have been for coach if he put in Air Bud and they lost."

"Today in biology class we learnt about all the health problems related to cigarettes Thank god I switched to crack last week"

"Lifeguards should focus more on water safety and less on me laying eggs in the sand."

"Steve Irwin died the same way he lived.. ..with animals in his heart."

"I woke up at 3 am this morning to the sound of my burglar alarm ""Time to go out and rob some people!"" I said"

"I think this Deadpool movie is going to really bring down the house. Having only three walls isn't good for their structural integrity."

"Boss: Where were you born? ME: MERICA Boss: which part? ME: What 'which part'? The whole body was born in MERICA."