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Joke of the Day

"What did the egg say to the boiling water? It will take me a while to get hard, I just got laid by a chick."

"My physicist gf told me she loves me to the moon and back .... I don't know if she was referring to the Distance or Displacement."

"How to Talk to Women Who Are Inside an MRI Tube"

"When a cop pulls you over and asks, ""Papers?"" answer ""Scissors."" then drive away.."

"What was the demon arrested for? Possession."

"Why do people at Disneyland hate coke heads? They're always cutting lines"

"There should be an option on travel websites that let's you search for ""flights that are least likely to have noisy children""."

"My mom told me not to cry wolf, but it was too late.Wolves were pouring out of my tear ducts, filling the kitchen and adjoining living room."

"I once tried starting a private airline business But it never took off"

"Sportscenter, episode 542783747363467367984768474756431063389425993399064375493638386747899532689432462567953467347: Men talking animatedly."