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Joke of the Day

"Why would you wear two pairs of pants while golfing? You might get a hole in one."

"I feel like life would be so much more enjoyable if punching bags and pinatas were strategically placed throughout the day"

"A friend of mine has a trophy wife... apparently it wasn't first place."

"Someone stole your tiny Stradivarius? Aw, poor baby, I'm playing the world's smallest violin for you. It's, uh, a different one. Gotta go."

"Why Donald Trump will win the primary but loose the general election? He can push through the Bushes but cannot climb a **Hill**ary."

"There was a maniac in town earlier today threatening to splash passersby with acid. Thankfully, police managed to neutralise him."

"I tried saving a cat in a tree but the darn thing wouldn't accept Jesus."

"The list of Republican Presidential Candidates."

"LOIS LANE: *pulls back from kissing* clark your glasses are hurting my nose can you take them off CLARK KENT: no"

"Why did the boy jump off the dock? Pier pressure"