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Joke of the Day
"Went for a 4 mile run this morning. Now everything hurts... even my eyelashes."
Next Joke
"Today at work, at my desk, my boss offered me a handjob... It's okay though, I'm self employed."
"Yo mama is so fat... When she wears a yellow raincoat, people yell ""Taxi!"""
"What does E.T. stand for? Freedom of speech"
"What is an MRI's favorite music? Metal"
"I thought I saw Bradley Cooper but it was just every poem ever written formed into a beach sunset with amazing hair"
"Three old ladies are sitting on a park bench... A man wearing a long raincoat approaches, opens it and flashes them. Two of the ladies immediately have a stroke. The third couldn't reach."
"The Feds say that marijuana has no accepted medical use, overlooking how it could help 20 million unemployed Americans not give a shit."
"I had a 12 inch Italian last night Then I went to Subway"
"How is a gay man like a tumbleweed? They blow and blow and blow until they end up stuck on a fence in Wyoming."