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Joke of the Day

"Picture someone stepping down off a curb that they didn't realize was there. Now you can say you've seen me dance."

"First Thatcher dies, then Ferguson retires... Somewhere there is a scouser with a lamp and one wish left. /english humour"

"Don't let an extra chromosome get you down."

"Q. What is the best way to get to Paradise? A. Turn right and go straight."

"Only 4 days left to use this joke I hate it when people ask me where I see myself in 5 years time. I don't know, I don't have 2020 vision."

"What is the fastest thing in the world? Milk. Because it's pasteurised before you see it."

"Scientists announce porpoises are second to man in intelligence levels. So that pushes women down to third place. Sorry"

"NASA Says Signs of Water Flowing on Mars, Possible Niches for Life Willing to take a bath in that following water in Mars."

"They say physicists like to work with harmonic oscillation because it's the only problem they can solve. That's not exactly true, but it is a good approximation."

"What kind of meat does the Pope eat? Nun"