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Joke of the Day

"If running on a treadmill was the only way to recharge our phones we would be the healthiest mofos on the planet."

"My dad said he couldn't get into Game of Thrones because he doesn't like fantasy so I asked him when he was going to stop watching Fox News."

"I'm pretty sure Robin Hood was black and he was just robbin the hood."

"My doctor says I have oppositional-defiant disorder. But he's wrong, so fuck him!"

"Why is 12 the highest number rednecks can count to? How else would they know how many cans are in a 12 pack."

"Woohoo! Donald Trump won the presidential election! As a Clinton voter I'm not happy that he won, just happy that I'm not Mexican"

"Shout out to my student loan for getting me through college. I don't know how I'll ever be able to repay you."

"What do you call it when flu season comes early? Premature inoculation."

"Why was Lara Croft sad? Because her career was in ruins"

"I like my woman how I like my burritos Wet"