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Joke of the Day

"Just saw a woman getting 'running lessons' with rubber bands & a head gear. Pffft, I could've taught her for free and with only a chainsaw"

"God made the world in 7 days... and the rest Made In China"

"For the Canadians (Warning: Offensive) How do you kill a fox with one leg? Make him run across Canada."

"I went to the store to buy 50ft of rope. The guy at the store said ""This spool of rope is on clearance for only $2. It's 500ft long."" ""Nah man"" I said ""I hate long good buys."""

"BLONDE BICYCLE Q: Why did the blonde run with the bike? A: It was going too fast for her to get on."

"Why are all Stormtroopers virgins? Because they don't hit anything."

"Got 45 minutes to kill? Watch a senior citizen put a key on a keychain."

"Stranger:So,you're a parent? Me: Yes,proud dad of a 5yo w/ special needs S:cool, I'm sort of a parent too, 2 dogs and a cat Me:.... Nope"

"Breaking News : Fulham have signed Brazil forward Fred to replace the Michael Jackson Statue outside of the ground."

"Judge: Do you mix horse meat with chicken? Defendant: Yes, my lord..... Judge; How much. Def: 50:50 Jud: Please elaborate. Def: **One horse to one chicken.**"