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Joke of the Day

"Being a ""Hopeless Romantic"" sounds kinda depressing. ""Pull my chair out for me?"" .. ""I'd love to, but I've given up."""

"One time I had a boss who called me while he was in the bathroom, and then he accidentally peed on himself, so sometimes good things happen."

"What do you call some one with no body and no nose? Nobody knows."

"What is a proletariat cannibal's favorite food? A double cheese bourger."

"Ketchup Bottle Joke [Source Inside]"

"Cop: You been drinking?nnMe: No.nnCop: Say the alphabet backwards.nnMe: Alphabet the. nnCop: Hilarious. Say each letter.nnMe: Each letter."

"All squirrels fly when you own a T-shirt cannon."

"Did you know that diarrhea is hereditary? It runs in your genes."

"The American school system is a lot like an EA game... It's mostly broken and if you pay more money you can access things that make you have an advantage over everyone else."

"""I see you have created a tiny human. I, too, have done this."" -me trying to make mom friends. Should I not whisper it? I'll try shouting"