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Joke of the Day

"This is the first Super Bowl party I've been to where there are babies. Not sure what to do. Do I, like, offer them a beer or something?"

"How does a New York University psychology major turn on his lights in the morning? By opening the car door."

"My university was really pissed off when they found out that I had a BSc., MSc., and a PhD. They really gave me the third degree."

"What did the retarded kid get on his IQ test? Drool"

"What has 7 arms and sucks? Def Leppard."

"Roses are red.. I'm in debt."

"Gaining weight from drinking so much water? Drink lighter fluid"

"Which is the most silky planet? Satin!"

"I would organize my thoughts but I'm afraid they would form a union and demand benefits."

"A pirate walks into a bar And the bartender says, ""hey, you know you have a steering wheel hanging from your zipper?"". The pirate replies,""arrr, I know, it's driving me nuts""."