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Joke of the Day

"I can totally relate to cranky elderly people. I mean you can only be nice for so long!"

"Hmmm... If I throw a watch in the garbage.... Is that considered a waste of time..?"

"Will the Australian eat jam? He Mar-might."

"What's the difference between Sin and Shame? It's a sin to put it in, and a shame to pull it out."

"I want to live the kind of life that when St. Peter looks over my list of sins he gives me a high-five before he sends me to hell."

"Reddit will end with not a bang, but a Pao."

"So I was on tindr today and someone offered me a $125/hr ""girlfriend experience"" So she expects me to pay her 125 an hour to argue with me in the middle of an Applebee's!?"

"My first original joke. What happens to a black mans hair when it feels nauseous?? It fro's up."

"""but what if I ask someone a question and they answer it"" - me sitting in my house too nervous to go to my neighbors party I was invited to"

"Why was I sentenced to 1 year in prison with 6 months probation after killing a nigger? On charges of impersonating a police officer."