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Joke of the Day
"Asian keanu Asian Keanu arrives at a party Asian Keanu gets bored Asian keanu Reeves"
Next Joke
"I like to stand in the corner at parties and blow on anyone who walks by. People hate it, but I'm a fan."
"What do you call an international criminal waffle that you dropped at the beach? Carmen Sandy Eggo"
"Do you guys ever get a shooting pain across your body like someone has a voodoo doll of you & they're stabbing it? No? How about now?"
"My favorite oxymorons: 1. Jumbo shrimp. 2. Act natural. 3. Boneless ribs. 4. Civil war. 5. Freezer burn. 6. Adult male. 7. Happy marriage."
"I'm so broke... I gotta jerk off the dog to feed the cat"
"[Arrives at work dressed as a sexy kitty] Boss: *points to memo on desk* ""It says no Halloween costumes"" Me: *slowly pushes memo off desk*"
"Not picking up the phone is some of the most fun you can have with a phone."
"What do you call a frat house in a quarry? A bromine."
"Finished christmas shopping for my entire family. *walks out of pharmacy*"