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Joke of the Day

"Why couldn't the melon couple run off and get married? Because they can't elope."

"Ever notice that Reddit is obsessed with correcting mistakes? Me to."

"What did the priest say before eating his salad? ""Lettuce pray"""

"I swallowed a Ice Cube and I haven't pooped it out yet, I'm really scared you guys."

"What does a zombie conductor say? Traaaains."

"There was an M&M in my spaghetti.. He was an M Pasta"

"Hey man, settle an argument for me? ""Sure"" [handing him a sword] Great, he's just in there"

"What do women and police cars have in common? They both make a lot of noise to let you know they are coming."

"Police arrested two kids yesterday. One was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one, and let the other one off."

"What do you call mints you can spread through social media? Memementos"