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Joke of the Day

"its raining men! hallelu..*thud* omg are you ok? *thud* oh sweet jesus! *thud* *thud* oh the horror! *thud* WHY GOD? WHYYYY??"

"The next Fast and the Furious should just be two hours of a guy doing steroids inside of a Nissan Cube."

"Donald Trump's plan to build a wall might actually work. The Chinese built a huge wall, and they have almost no Mexicans in their country."

"Why do bulimics love KFC? It comes with a bucket."

"Why do Zelda and Link smoke weed? Because they live in the kingdom where the hyrule."

"OLD MAN: I fought in WWII ME: Oh yeah? What was your kill:death ratio OLD MAN: what ME: Can you rocket jump? OLD MAN: I wish Hitler had won"

"What are caterpillars afraid of? **Dog**erpillars!"

"""Can I pet your dog?"" ""Sure, but he can be aggressive."" [He pushes a pamphlet about the dangers of gluten towards me with his nose]"

"Europe must have a detergent based economy.. ..because it's tough on Greece."

"I don't throw snowballs because I believe snowman life begins at snowball conception."