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Joke of the Day

"Most Fascinating Part of the Body I used to think the brain was the most fascinating part of the body but then i realized ""pssssh, look what's telling me that"""

"I had a cough like that once... I didn't kick the bucket, I was just a little pail!"

"Why are astronomers so popular with the ladies? Chicks dig stars."

"What's 6"" long, bent to the left, and in the front of my pants?? My iPhone 6."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? Drum Roll please! To get to the other side. Thank you ladies and gents for the applause, I'll be here all night."

"Dear people that brush your teeth in the bathroom at work: stop that. You don't live here. Chew gum like the rest of us."

"Take me down to the gentrified city where the grass is green and the girls can't even"

"Today I'm approaching teens dressed like I'm from the future, locking eyes, and saying ""Happy Presidents Day, sir"" with a wink"

"Taking my wife to a wife swapping party tonight... Hoping to get a PS3 in return."

"Interviewer: Tell me about your future plans. Me: You mean, like, just tomorrow, or for, like, the whole weekend?"