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Joke of the Day

"Thank you, slow walking family in front of me on the footpath, No please, take your time.... and definitely spread out, so you create a barricade of idiots."

Next Joke
 
"ME: Man, I really should get glasses. I'm blind as a-- BAT NEXT TO ME: blind as a what ME: um BAT: as a what ME: BAT: say it"
"What does a triangular acorn say when it grows up? Geometry."
"How does a monster begin a fairy tale? ""Once upon a slime . . ."""
"Q: What do you call a beaten politician? A: Donald Trumped"
"if you ever wanna impress a girl just bring a baby on your date and then basically just outperform the baby at everything it's really easy"
"Knock knock Who's there? Grandma Grandma who? Grandma gun, were goin huntin'"
"Why should Mexico accept Syrian refugees? With the level of crime and political violence, they will feel right at home."
"The world is my oyster. Expensive and gross."
"Why does everybody hate the grammar nazi He's just trying to make it Reich"