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Joke of the Day

"My kids don't beg for toys and I realized it's because they never get to see commercials Because they're locked in a cage"

"What did the dick say to the condom? Cover me, I'm going in."

"I call my dick Ambidextrous Because I fuck girls left and right."

"I only date black girls... Because I hate meeting fathers."

"What's the difference between a regular horse and a police horse? A police horse has an extra asshole on top."

"People complain when my baby is crying and then they complain when I stuff her in the overhead bin, MAKE UP YOUR GD MINDS"

"I walk away from auto-flush toilets like movie stars walk away from explosions"

"How do you start a baby shower? Throw it into a wood chipper."

"I used to be into sadism, necrophilia, and bestiality... ...but then I realized I was just beating a dead horse."

"What did the socialist use before candles? Electricity."