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Joke of the Day

"I bought a retro computer. It came with friends still on the outside of it."

Next Joke
 
"My wife left me because she said I made a meal out of everything. I intend to make her eat those words."
"Van Gogh hands a wrapped up box to his girlfriend. ""Vincent, please tell me this isn't another ear."" ""What?"""
"(NSFW) My wife was doing the mannequin challenge way before it got popular. She only does it when we have sex though."
"I'm gonna steal a bunch of Jesus fish off minivans and then put them back three days later."
"when I see a Facebook relationship status 'it's complicated' I imagine love through wormholes over tens of thousands of years, alien biology"
"What's the difference between karate and judo? Karate is a method of self defense and judo is what bagels are made of."
"How do you play Iraqi bingo? F18...B52...F18"
"I was holding the door for an Asian guy and he said ""sank you."" So I punched him. Cant believe that he brought up Pearl Harbor lke that"
"*sets up booth, hangs up sign ""$5 Mustache Rides!"" *nobody shows up. I knew I shouldn't have named the damn pony 'mustache'"