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Joke of the Day

"How do Mexicans cut their pizza? With Little Ceasars *drops mic, Harlem shakes off stage*"

"I wish I could just ""like"" a text message so I don't have to respond."

"Sorry sweetie, but no. Alcohol is not an excuse for being a dirty slut. Nice try though."

"Christmas is always awkward in Steve Harvey's house None of the presents have the correct names."

"Silver and lead are sitting at a bar and gold walks in. Silver yells "" au, get outta here! """

"I witnessed an attempted murder earlier... Luckily only one crow showed up..."

"What's three feet long and keeps a twat warm? Donald Trump's scarf."

"I clocked this beautiful woman earlier. I'll probably never see her againit was a pretty big clock."

"I wasted 400 years of my life trying to figure out if I was a vampire."

"You now what's great about fucking twenty five year olds? There's twenty of them."