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Joke of the Day

"Happy Fourth of July Guys! I hope Internet Explorer sends this in time."

"Just a little poem for all the night owls up right now. Roses are red. Violets are blue. Go the fuck to sleep."

"My dog is disabled so I have to hold him up when he pees. Long story short, I'm getting really good at writing my name in the snow."

"I won't block you, but I will put a curse on you that you'll never be able to finish a sneeze ever again for the rest of your life."

"What's the worlds strongest animal? A 'buff'alo"

"My girlfriend just made a peepeeAND a poppy at the same time Should I break up with her?"

"So I just flashed my hard drive. Though why showing my computer my schlong is meant to speed it up I'll never know."

"No one ever talks about Peter Pans brother. Peter Pots"

"My son asked what it was like to be a parent so I begged him to make me chicken nuggets and then held on to his leg so he couldn't move."

"My kid is almost old enough for social media so we'll need to have ""the talk"" soon. You know, about your/you're and their/there/they're."