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Joke of the Day

"Is it racist that I only use chopsticks when eating Asian food? I'm never like, ""Time for pancakes! Where are my chopsticks?"""

"There is a order to the universe: space, time, and Chuck Norris...just kidding Chuck Norris is the first"

"Lying in bed, my girlfriend turned to me and said: ""You're a lot like a math exam."" I replied ""Why? Because I'm long and hard?"" She said, ""No, I'm cheating on you with an Asian."""

"Money talks ...but all mine ever says is good-bye."

"My psychiatrist says we need to work on my intimacy issues but then he's always the one who refuses to snuggle with me on his couch."

"What's the difference between Reddit and Facebook? About a day"

"Chuck Norris is the only person in the world that can actually email a roundhouse kick."

"Two Spanish historians believe that they've discovered the Holy Grail. Indiana Jones found it back in 1989, but they lost track of it."

"You think Japanese teenagers are shocked the first time they see a real live naked woman & it's not all pixelated looking down there?"

"I painted my computer black... thinking it would run faster but it just stopped working"