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Joke of the Day

"Is it racist that I only use chopsticks when eating Asian food? I'm never like, ""Time for pancakes! Where are my chopsticks?"""

"What does Egyptian airport security have in common with Los Angeles airport security? Both have LAX security."

"How do you know when your girlfriend is getting fat? When she fits in your wife's clothes."

"At what age do you tell your kids that the UN isn't real"

"I would totally surf a tsunami. If I didn't get nauseous on water. And if tsunamis weren't dangerous. And I knew how to surf."

"What is a duck's favorite TV show ? The feather forecast !"

"If I had a penny for every trump joke, I'd have enough money to build a wall..."

"What's the difference between a 13 year old girl and a cow? No really, what's the difference? I accidentally mixed up all the meat in my freezer."

"Why are strip clubs now banned in South Carolina? Because they can't handle anyone else making it rain"

"Religious orders are more than just a sacrament They're a habit, too."