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Joke of the Day

"A man was admitted to the ER with 6 small plastic horses up his bum... ...doctors described his condition as ""stable""."

"Dog & Mosquito were in Love .. mosquito kissed the dog .. Dog became emotional...gave Love bite to mosquito . Mosquito died of Rabies & Dog died of Dengue . MORAL:- LOVE is DANGEROUS"

"How did Pinocchio figure out he was made of wood? He was jacking off one day and his hand caught on fire."

"The best thing about sharing a king sized bed with your spouse is that if you move far enough away it feels like you're completely alone."

"What is the best use for a wet dog?[x-post from /r/MeanJokes] Getting the smell of white people out of your house."

"Boss:I need you to do something for me... Me:what? Boss:go on the jobcentre website and look for another job"

"If you're having luftballon problems I feel bad for you son I got 99 luftballons and whatever whatever I don't speak German"

"What's the worst thing you can hear after giving Willie Nelson a bj? I'm not Willie Nelson."

"i dont see why i should have to brush my teeth. you dont brush the rest of your bones, do you? its ridiculous."

"Why is the leaning tower of Pisa in Italy? It's Italicized"