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Joke of the Day

"A priest, a rabbi and a leprechaun walk into a bar... ... but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative Bill Bailey."

"Why are there so many Johnson in he phone book? They all have phones."

"i just went to a bar god damn, it was one sharp crowbar."

"4: Let's hunt turkeys, Daddy. Me: How do we do that? 4: Put up a big sign that says, ""Come here, Turkeys!"" I might be raising Elmer Fudd."

"Why can't single women fart? They don't get an asshole till they get married."

"It would be totally gay if Elon Musk opened a gas company in the future. Not because it will be out of trend but because it will be named GasX."

"What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? ""Where's my tractor?"""

"I crashed into the back of a dwarf's car... He got out, looked at the damage and said ""I'm not happy"". So I replied "" Which one are you then?"""

"The jumper I got for Christmas kept picking up static electricity so I took it back to the shop and exchanged it for another one free of charge."

"What's the difference between a tornado and a divorce in the South? Nothing, someone's losing the trailer. -Robin Williams"