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Joke of the Day

"[making small talk at a party] Hair products are so expensive these days. Do you think that's why poor people look like shit?"""

Next Joke
 
"iTunes has got it all wrong. The hottest single of the year is me."
"Kanye West Running For President 2020"
"*at a loud house party* Is this your- I SAID IS THIS YOUR HOUSE? I NOTICED THE DOG BOWL. WHERE IS HE OR SHE, I'D LIKE TO PET HIM OR HER"
"An old Jewish man won the lottery, and decided to donate half of it to the nazi party. ""Fair is fair,"" he said. ""They gave me the winning numbers."""
"I want to donate a large amount of money to a rape clinic and I won't take no for an answer."
"Imagine how quickly Breitbart would believe in climate science if they could use it to stop black people from voting."
"I have read so many things about the impact of smoking and drinking alcohol I think I will quit reading soon."
"My problem with McDonalds is I can't go retrieve my kids in the play tubes because I can't fit in the play tubes because I eat at McDonalds."
"What do you call a group of girls all named Paige? A chapter."