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Joke of the Day

"My wife was raped by a mime He preformed unspeakable acts on her"

"Some people have difficulties sleeping... but I can do it with my eyes closed."

"Homework. The teachers' way of knowing how smart the parent is."

"If a threesome is having sex with three people, and a twosome is having sex with two people... I'm handsome."

"A: My dog had a nose surgery - B: How does he smell? A: Terrible!"

"It's not that I don't know how to juggle... I just don't have the balls to do it."

"Women.... Women are like condoms, they spend too much time in your wallet and not enough time on your dick."

"In your will, be sure to write you want to be cremated. The night before you die, eat as many popcorn kernels as humanly possible."

"So a sandwich... So a sandwich walks into a bar and the bartender says, ""sorry, we don't serve food here."""

"Rick Astley will let you borrow any movie from his Pixar collection - except one. He's never gonna give you Up."