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Joke of the Day

"I had a happy childhood. My dad would put me inside a tire and then roll me down a hill. They were Goodyears."

"My chemistry teacher went on a camping trip and died... He was exposed to the elements."

"""Excuse me, do you validate parking?"" I sure do, champ. *kisses your forehead* Your parking is second to none."

"Why did America remove the ""u"" from ""colour""? Because fuck u that's why"

"Someone ordered a lion statuette for a Pride parade Apparently there was a mixup at the manufacturer and they only sent the rear half of the lion. What followed was a catastrophe"

"There's a Bullying Support Group meeting, tomorrow night at 8 ... You'd better f*cking be there."

"Dad Joke - Did the melon get married without permission? No, it Cantelope."

"When David shot Goliath, there was a giant thunderstorm. He was just slinging in the rain."

"Is it wrong to hate a certain race? I'm ok with a 5km but really don't like 10km."

"im near a club thats popular with college kids and a white girl in a wu-tang shirt just yelled ""PBR! WOOOO!"""