167459

Joke of the Day

"I learned 2 things at least when I was married 1. Always passcode lock your phone 2. Don't use a nude pic of your gf as the lock screen"

"Girls, if you're gonna shave your eyebrows off just to draw them on again, at least make them interesting. How about drawing two umbrellas?"

"So a Bear Walks Into a Bar... and the bartender says, ""What'll it be?"" The bear says,"" I'll have a drink and a... bag of peanuts."" The bartender says, ""Why the big pause?"""

"what do you call it when a prostitute cries while having sex hormones"

"How are AIDS researchers like Jews? There's a lot less of them than there used to be..."

"Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Listening to an antijoke."

"Yeah, but is it Tyrannosauri Rex or Tyrannosaurus Rexes? *The Jehovahs Witness slams my own door in my face"

"Westboro Baptist Church Founder Fred Phelps Dies At 84.Who wants to protest a funeral?"

"The toothbrush was probably invented in Arkensas Anywhere else it would have been called a teethbrush."

"I keep getting a pain when driving where the road goes under the river, but only when I have other people in the car. The doctor says it's car pool tunnel syndrome."