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Joke of the Day

"????My lactose-free, gluten-free, wheat-free, carb-free, nut-free, fat-free milkshake, brings all the weirdos to the yard...????"

"Women should be like a well placed rug You should be able to lay them then leave them"

"Dance like the picture's not being tagged. Love like you've never been unfriended. Tweet like no one's following."

"Did you hear about Princess Dianas car crash? She was all over the radio. And the dash. And the windshield..."

"Reward: Lost Dog What kind of a reward is a lost dog?"

"How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irish person? None"

"Why did the rich man go crazy? He had one-million dollars, but no cents."

"Listen, I'll play that funky music if you ask me in a nice, non-derogatory way."

"Hillary Clinton logs onto her email server [deleted]"

"In every successful relationship the MAN always has the last word - ""Yes Dear."""