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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a girl who fucks dogs? Weird... Haha fuck naw you call em Whitney Wisconsin"

"I'm starving. I haven't eaten all year."

"Mr. Buffalo: I caught my son making out with a girl Me: SWEET! Mr. Buffalo: And a boy Me: So, I guess you could say he's your... Bi-son"

"One time I did mushrooms and played GTA and felt regret for the lives I was taking I was all ""Holy shit these people have families"""

"Why do dinosaurs wear glasses? To make sure they don't step on other dinosaurs."

"My wife said to me that she wished I wouldn't drop the F-bomb in front of the kids. What the fuck is the F-bomb?"

"How do you tell a boy chromosome from a girl chromosome? Check their jeans."

"Today's so hot it was offered a lucrative recording contract even though it can't sing"

"I tried being a barber for a while but I just couldn't cut it. Bonus joke: Had to buy a stepladder the other day, I never knew my real ladder."

"I've recently admitted to being a masochist. The realization has been painful, but I like it."