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Joke of the Day

"Two black guys are in a car, who's driving? The cop"

"I love you Mario but you need to stop taking shrooms, breaking into haunted houses, and killing turtles! You have a dinosaur to take care of"

"I've been arrested for robbing a bank dressed as a frog. It's the first time I've ever kermitted a crime."

"To test my ability to emphasthize I tried to force myself to empathize with Brock Turner But if I learned anything from him it's that some things should never be forced"

"I've been trying to give myself a sexchange... but I just can't pull it off."

"Turns out, telemarketers don't like it when 5 year olds answer the phone and tell them princess Ariel stories."

"What do you call a lesbian with big hands Well hung..."

"A magician was walking down the street .... and he turned into a grocery store"

"The leading cause of depression is reality."

"I'm a lawyer for an Orthodontist He's got me on retainer."