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Joke of the Day

"Who really appreciates a good fisting? A sock puppy."

"Joseph Smith sold so many copies of the Book of Mormon That they made him a prophet."

"actually these are my therapy bees i'm allowed to take them on the bus with me"

"Kate Upton Nightmare... ""Hey, last night I had a nightmare, I dreamed I was Kate Upton's new born baby, but I was bottle fed... ... [I know it's soggy, but it made me laugh...]"

"Meteorologists, frowning, like prophets of doom, pleading with their Snow God for mercy."

"What the hell is Minecraft? Hitler's lesser known, second, book about his love of knitting."

"Trump wants to ban Muslims but if we learned anything from Prohibition it's that people will just make Muslims in their bathtubs."

"Never trust a mathematician with a graph. They're always plotting something."

"How did the bucket's mom know he was sick? He was a little pail."

"A policeman spots a woman driving and knitting at the same time. Driving up beside her he shouts out the window... ""Pull over!"" ""No"" she shouts back ""a pair of socks!"""