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Joke of the Day

"Why are higher quality CD/DVD players white? Because they read."

"In a parallel universe, a zebra is walking around her contemporary decorated house, on top of a skinned blonde chick with big hoops rug."

"I'll agree to almost anything if you set a cupcake in front of me. I won't be listening. Because...cupcake."

"Saw a black man run down the street with a flatscreen under his arm At first i thought it was mine, but then i remembered that mine was chained in my backyard picking cotton"

"If my kid vanished on a plane like in that Jodie Foster movie I'd spend maybe 2-3 hrs enjoying the legroom & quiet before I started looking."

"How much hummus did the anorexic girl order? A tahini bit."

"My mailman got a sex change. I guess you'd call him a post man now."

"What do you get when you mix yoga and scouting? Concentration camps."

"Which two musicians are famous for saying, ""What?"" Lil' Jon and Beethoven."

"Two Muffins Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first muffin says to the second, ""Is it getting hot in here?"" The second muffin says ""AAAAHHHH!!!! A talking muffin!!!"""