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Joke of the Day

"Ultimate confusion What is the ultimate confusion? Two gay guys in a hottub full of sausages."

"I keep my friends close *lean in, whisper* and my anemones closer ""Sir thats very fun but aquarium policy forbids sitting in the touch tank"""

"There is a blind guy called Miles, what is the name of his guide dog? Roger Daltrey."

"My baby's sick. We used rectal thermometer on him & he didn't even mind. Looks like we might have a little choreographer on our hands."

"I almost didn't remember today was September 11th Then I felt bad, because I said I'd never forget."

"Why couldn't I run the Compressed File? I was missing the important Bits."

"This holiday season, get your girl a Jared Diamond ...but get her Collapse--she's probably already read Guns, Germs, and Steel."

"Everyone have a Good Friday! ...I'll show myself out"

"If you call a group of lions a pride, and a group of crows a murder; what do you call a group of pedophiles? The British Parliament"

"Farmer What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor"