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Joke of the Day

"[creating animals] God- I want an animal with 2 humps Angel- And a cute face? G- Yes.. And make them spit at humans A- LOL G- LOL"

"If vampires have no reflection, how come they have such neat hair?"

"I finally found a girlfriend! She was lost untill she found me. I'm glad I could give her a ride to her boyfriend's house."

"Remember when you were a kid and you used to run through the sprinklers at your uncle's farm and he'd dry you off with his strong arms?"

"What do you call an unwanted sext? A molext."

"I was seeing a therapist for trust issues, but I had to quit going when I found out he was seeing other patients."

"Car next to me in liquor store parking lot has a family sticker. She has SEVEN kids. I better get in there quick! She's gonna buy it all."

"Jackasses and Onions What do you get when you cross a Donkey and an Onion??? You get a great piece of ASS that brings a tear to your eyes!!!!"

"I bet it's crazy hard to do the YMCA dance in Chinese..."

"Where is Donald Trump gonna put all of the illegal immigrants once he arrests them? Juantanamo"