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Joke of the Day

"Why can't you give Elsa a balloon? Because she'd just Let It Go. As told to me by my 5 year-old daughter"

"What's Fozzy Bear's favorite city? Mil-wocka-wocka-waukee"

"If my memory foam mattress really had ""memory,"" it could write for Penthouse."

"If I were a werewolf I wouldn't have to chain myself up at night because I don't like going out anyway."

"Two blondes are found frozen to death at a drive-in theater. They were watching ""Closed for the Winter."""

"Today's youth are getting worse.. Today's youth are getting worse. I was in a church yesterday, when I saw a guy lighting a cigarette from the candle. I was so shocked, that I dropped my beer bottle"

"If I don't mention you, then the tweet/status wasn't about you. But if the shoe fits, then lace that bitch up and wear it."

"What do you call a cannibal that only eats disabled people? A Vegetarian"

"A termite walks into a pub and asks... ...is the bar tender here?"

"What do rednecks say after they broke up? We can still be brother and sister."