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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between fancy food and military food? Fancy food is delicious, but military food is deliciousir!"

"Secretly killing birds and making It look like a suicide - Windexter."

"What do you call a hooker with a runny nose? Full. Credit afroman for this one"

"How does Donald Trump plan to silence the terrorists? Muzzle 'em"

"The milkman A man comes home to his wife and says 'apparently the milkman has slept with every woman on this street except one', his wife replies 'I bet it's that stuck up cow at number 12'"

"My wife wants to have another kid. That's like seeing light at the end of a tunnel and saying, ""I think we better turn around."""

"I had a really big shit the other day. It was a real pain in the ass."

"Burger King's slogan ""Have It Your Way"" was shortened from ""Are You Sure You Wanna Eat This? Ok. Have It Your Way""."

"Why didn't Hitler get tertiary education? He couldn't stand Jew-near college."

"I'm going on a vodka diet. Apparently you can lose 3 days in one week..."