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Joke of the Day

"I was grinding on a girl in a club last night and she said to me, ""Will you please take your skateboard and f#ck off!"""

"Q: When do the leaves begin to turn? A: The night before a test."

"I'm concentrating so hard on trying not to eat a third cupcake that I literally can't do my job"

"A morning-after pill but for when you accidentally hear a Maroon 5 song"

"Did you hear about the man that lost half of his body? He's all right now."

"Litter of puppies = cute. Liter of puppies = gross."

"What happens when a pizzaman does an AMA on Reddit? OP delivers."

"Who was the first female commodore? The Commodore Amiga."

"My skis are like my parents They're drifting apart"

"What did the monkeys say when they saw the Northern Lights? Ooooooh, aaaaaah..."