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Joke of the Day

"Shocking that people who've been physically assaulting each other for 3 hours would lose their tempers."

"[loud bar] Her: I have to urinate Me: What? H: Urinate M: What? H: URINATE! M: Well, YOU'RE a 10! H: Huh? No! You're like a 5. I gotta pee."

"Seenus trouble Dad: Son, I have seenus trouble. Me: Seenus? Dont you mean sinus trouble, pops? Dad: No, son. Seenus, I was out with my girlfriend and your mom seenus."

"I have a joke about minidisc... ...but it's a little CD."

"What happens when you mix human DNA with goat DNA? You get kicked out of the petting zoo."

"Say what you want about paedophiles. At least they drive slow in school zones."

"What's the worst hereditary disease? Cousins"

"A dyslexic Sanders supporter was kicked out of the botanical gardens He kept trying to peel the ferns."

"Knock Knock - Who's there? Tyfe ... Tyfe Who? Yes, thanks. Milk and two sugars please."

"I wonder what part of the Constitution we'll all be fighting over today? I hope it's the preamble. That part's bullshit."