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Joke of the Day

"I won the dirty joke contest at scout camp with this What's the best thing about twenty-two year olds? There's twenty of them. It's better said then written."

"I used to be opposed to organ transplant... But after having one done myself; I guess I've had a change of heart."

"You know Toothpaste was invented in Alabama? Anywhere else and it would have been called Teethpaste!"

"Why did nobody want to be around Hitler? Because he was very gassy."

"What's the most musical part of a fish? Its scales."

"It's hard to explain things to kleptomaniacs They always take things literally."

"I hope I die alone. I mean, you'd have to be a pretty big jerk to hope others die with you."

"5yo's pretending she's a tourist at a hotel. All good, but I draw the line when my services are criticized because the ""toilet's too cold."""

"Devil worshipper leader: ""Due to a typo we have summoned the wrong demon."" Stan: ""Hey there."""

"""I've been waiting for this my whole life"" I thought as the man pointed the gun at my head and demanded I recite ""Bohemian Rhapsody"""