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Joke of the Day

"So, Facebook is celebrating its 10th birthday. What do you buy for the social media app that makes you hate everyone?"

"What do you say when a Polish magician performs a magic trick? Nailed it"

"What does a sock taste like? Defeat"

"Never bang someone old enough to be your mom especially if you were adopted"

"A baby Seal A baby seal walks into a club."

"what's harder than closing your blinds? My dick as I watch you through them"

"I'm not gullible but she said I was the best she's ever had and then to wait by the phone for instructions on how to get my wallet back."

"My first wife died from eating poison mushrooms; my second wife died of a fractured skull... She wouldn't eat her mushrooms."

"Laying in bed, watching the ceiling fan spin, my thoughts wonder to 1. Who turned the ceiling fan on 2. Why don't I have telekinetic powers"

"Dad said I need to be the rock for a friend who is having a tough time. Currently practicing that eyebrow thing & wrestling moves."