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Joke of the Day

"I'm not gullible but she said I was the best she's ever had and then to wait by the phone for instructions on how to get my wallet back."

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"Chess makes us to realize our life!!! Chess says everything about husband and wife. The King has to take things one step at a time, while the Queen can do whatever she wants."
"Donald Trump will run for President ... When the Cubs win World Series."
"Roasted beef is like regular beef except the cows family tells embarrassing stories about it, which are tough and tasteless."
"Did you hear about the suspect who was released from jail after he touched grounded metal and received a static shock? He was cleared of all charges."
"I started a business putting explosives in prayer mats Prophets are though the roof."
"So there were these two sisters.. a blonde and a brunette. The brunette goes to her sister and says ""I just fucked a brazilian!"" The blonde replies ""You slut! How many more is that than a million?"""
"Caller: Operator! Operator! I don't know what's wrong with my phone but I can't make long distance calls any longer! Operator: Don't worry. Your long distance calls are long enough already!"
"What do you call a male camel toe? A moose knuckle"
"If sex is a pain in the ass then you are doing it wrong"