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Joke of the Day

"What does a gay guy and a freezer have in common? Both get packed with meat. I'll show myself out."

"I'm starting to think my neighbor is a drug dealer... for one, he has like 10 cellphones... and secondly, he sells me drugs like everyday."

"I got in from the pub and poured myself a glass of water. ""You're drunk, aren't you?"" said a disappointed voice behind me. ""What makes you say that, honey?"" I asked. She said, ""This isn't your house."""

"Students of Chemistry Helium walks into a bar. The bartender says ""We don't serve noble gasses in here."" Helium doesn't react."

"DATE: ...so that's how I ended up at Harvard Law! ME: Sometimes I make a fruit salad in my mouth by biting into different kinds of fruit LOL"

"Thank god for smart phones I was getting tired or reading the back of shampoo bottles while in the bathroom"

"MAST JOKES: I was fall from 4th floor http://mastjoks.blogspot.com/2013/01/i-was-fall-from-4th-floor.html#.UQasZ2fq90Q.reddit"

"Accidentally pressed 2 for Spanish and Donald Trump's security team came out of nowhere to deport me."

"Why couldn't the NSA whistleblower leave Russia? He was snowed in."

"Where do ghosts live? At the dead end."