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Joke of the Day

"Anyone can beat a polygraph.It doesn't even have hands."

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"what type of shoes do artists wear? sketchers"
"Instagram is the most pleasant social media site because it's really difficult to take ignorant, racist pictures of dogs & brunch"
"Having sex while drunk is like trying to pierce a Capri Sun with an earthworm"
"A deaf couple decide they want to break up... Boy: Girl: Boy: Girl: Boy: They went their separate ways and never heard from eachother again."
"On our first date, i'll carve our initials onto a tree. Because it's the most romantic way to let you know that I have a knife"
"I went down to the local Pub and I came home with this great joke told to me by a baby. Goo goo ga ga gah?"
"I put the D in Fucking because I know that's what you really want. -autocorrect"
"What do you do if you're attacked by a gang of clowns? Go for the juggler."
"Scientists just discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%... it's called 'wedding cake'"