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Joke of the Day

"Willie Nelson? (NSFW) What is the worst thing Willie Nelson could say to you while you are giving him a blowjob? I'm not really Willie Nelson"

"Person: Don't bite the hand that feeds you. Me: I understand. *I spend the rest of my life biting the hands of everyone who hasn't fed me*"

"I have a coworker whose humour gets drier ...as he gets more dehydrated. (True story)"

"Hear about the new restaurant called Karma? There's no menu: You get what you deserve"

"Remove all the poles if you don't want me stripping, Mr. Bus Driver."

"If pigs could vote they'd always vote for the guy who brings the food, even though he's the same one who will slaughter and eat them later."

"I love graphs! I used to be obsessed with them... I've calmed down now though, you've gotta draw the line somewhere"

"Did you hear that Jim Carrey lost his left arm in a horrific accident? I guess that makes him all-righty then."

"What does a Redhead with a yeast infection like to do in her spare time? Make Gingerbread"

"Making people uncomfortable & upset really gives me the most happiness in life . Above all else , I hope to make you feel wrong"