162076
Joke of the Day
"People say I've got no willpower But I've quit smoking loads of times."
Next Joke
"Santa is the ultimate hipster. Works one day a year and spends the rest of the year judging you."
"What did the carrot say to the DJ? Lettuce Turnip The Beet"
"honestly it just makes me fat free italian when u tell me salad dressings aren't a good way to describe emotions"
"Try not to remember that your brain is the pilot of a meat robot that can't do twenty pushups without dying."
"Whats the highest grade you can get in the trap? B's"
"What do you mean I've had enough to drink?!! Hold my beer while I fight this lamppost."
"How do I know when my girlfriend is having an orgasm? ... My hormones"
"On average, a person has sex 86 times a year. Apparently, this is going to be one hell of a week."
"One slip of the tongue, and you're in deep shit. What do the Mafia and a pussy have in common?"