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Joke of the Day
"Why shouldn't you trust big cats? They are a bunch of lion cheetah pussies."
Next Joke
"I just tinder matched with a block of cheese."
"What do you call cows with 2 legs? Lean beef. bonus: What do you call cows with no legs? Ground beef."
"[Lions watching a romantic comedy about humans] Why doesn't he simply mount her with no apparent warning?"
"MUGGER: give me ur wallet ME: stand back i have mace MUGGER: [sniffing] is this cookies-scented febreze"
"What do you call a baby bull? A bully!"
"Young Bobby was being fitted for glasses and his father standing beside him said ""Now remember son. Don't wear them when you're not looking at anything."""
"BREAKING NEWS Paula Deen's snack mix now contains ""Brazil Nuts"""
"Annoy your wife by saying ""wow"" every time a chick gets out of the limo on The Bachelor."
"I won't undo a retweet in case someone finds it offensive. I just knit them onto pillows and give them as Christmas gifts."