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Joke of the Day

"How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb? None. German light bulbs are quality products."

"Engineers To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the engineer, some idiots used a glass that's twice as big than necessary."

"Why are girls like rocks? You skip the flat ones."

"Russia and Ukraine. What did Russia say to Ukraine? Go Crimea River."

"What's the difference between a prostitute and a crack dealer? A prostitute can just wash her crack and use it again"

"Say what you will about Clinton being a womanizer But Bush had the Twins go down on him."

"What do you call a lazy Italian at the gym? ...Mussolini"

"The hardest part of parenting is standing idly by while your children build a mediocre couch fort."

"If I had a year to live, I would spend it with my ex... because it would be the longest year of my life."

"I'm such a funny guy that everybody laughs at me. My life is a meme :')"