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Joke of the Day

"Me and my girlfriend tried anal the other night... Me and my girlfriend tried anal the other night for the first time. didn't go so well. no idea how my ass is supposed to fit inside her vagina..."

"Went to the shoe store and bought a pair of converse, disappointed they haven't talked back yet."

"Kevin Spacey ordering a takeaway coffee from Starbucks and receiving the cup with 'Kevin E' written on the side."

"Invitations: $10 Cupcakes: $15 Facility rental: $100 Not having 20 kids in my house: priceless Math of a mother"

"Accidentally pressed the soap dispenser instead of the toothpaste. Mouth feels clean but I don't think I'll be able to curse today. Shucks."

"Why did Tiger Woods bring three socks instead of two? In case he got a hole in one."

"Today feminists asked me how I view lesbians Apparently ""in HD"" wasn't the right answer."

"How does a cat tell time?? In meowers"

"I hate it when people beg for likes, like if you agree?"

"So I was invited to an amputee party last night... It was absolutely crawling with pussy."